The Moment You Stop Abandoning Yourself
How healing begins when you finally stay connected to you
Many women know what it feels like to abandon themselves.
Not intentionally.
Not because they don’t care about themselves.
But because survival taught them to.
You learned to push your feelings aside.
To ignore exhaustion.
To prioritize everyone else’s needs first.
To stay quiet when something hurt.
Little by little, you disconnected from yourself in order to stay connected to others.
And often, you didn’t even realize it was happening.
Self-Abandonment Is Often a Survival Response
For many women, self-abandonment started early.
Maybe love felt conditional.
Maybe conflict felt unsafe.
Maybe your role was to care for everyone else.
So your nervous system adapted.
You learned:
don’t ask for too much
don’t make things harder
don’t upset anyone
don’t take up space
And over time, you became incredibly skilled at reading others… while losing connection to yourself.
What Self-Abandonment Looks Like
Self-abandonment doesn’t always look dramatic.
Sometimes it looks like:
saying yes when your body says no
apologizing for your feelings
staying in exhausting situations too long
ignoring your own limits
dismissing your needs as “not important enough”
These patterns are not character flaws.
They are nervous system strategies built around survival and connection.
Healing Is Learning to Stay With Yourself
Healing begins when you stop leaving yourself behind.
When you pause and ask:
“What do I need right now?”
“What am I feeling?”
“What feels true for me?”
These questions may feel unfamiliar at first.
But every time you listen inward, trust begins to rebuild.
Your body learns:
“My needs matter too.”
You Are Allowed to Stay Connected to Yourself
You no longer have to disappear to keep peace.
You no longer have to ignore yourself to belong.
You no longer have to abandon your truth to feel loved.
You are allowed to:
rest
feel
speak honestly
set boundaries
honor your limits
And still be worthy of connection.
Begin Here
Healing doesn’t ask you to become someone new.
It asks you to come back to yourself.
One choice.
One boundary.
One honest moment at a time.
With compassion for your journey,
Terry De Aragon, RN, BSN
Trauma-Informed Holistic Nurse Coach
Awaken Your Lioness
